23 Aug 2023 - lyd
Hey, its been a while. I’ve been caught up in a lot of stuff. I haven’t had the time to focus on this website as much unfortunately. By the way though, I’ve taken part in some Game Jams since last time. I’ll add a link to my latest entry soon, so look out for that I guess?
Anyways, thats not what I’m to discuss today however. I’m gonna try starting a series of posts based on something that’s been happening to me lately. Introducing,
I love dreams, especially lucid ones. I don’t know how to put it into words, but something about how they feel? Its almost nostalgic?
But for the past 2 weeks, I’ve been experiencing a lot more vivid dreams than usual. On top of actually remembering them. So I started writing an informal Dream Diary, and I’ve noticed one they all had in common:
Touhou Project was somehow involved in almost all of them, to at least some degree.
Touhou is a long running series of bullet hell shooters that started life on the Japanese PC-98 series of Home Computers, before making its way over to Windows in the 2000s, where it would cement itself as a major cornerstone in not just Japanese fan/amateur created content (Doujins), but also in internet culture period; chances are if you’ve ever been online you’ve probably seen something influenced by or directly from the series (Bad Apple, We Are Japanese Goblin, Night of Nights, those silly fumo things).
I’m sure its obvious by now, but I became a huge fan of the series. Like, ‘huge enough that one of my first instances of being out as trans publically was wearing a Marisa cosplay to a con’ huge. ‘went out of my way to actually buy a fumo’ huge. ‘am currently developing my own unannounced fan-game in my spare time with plans to eventually release it on steam’ huge.
Okay, maybe not ‘huge’ in comparison to others (how do people afford all those fumos…). But I won’t deny that I absolutely love the series; the games, music, characters, settings, the tie-in literature, the influences from asian mythology and folklore, the way the music CDs make me feel this weird nostalgia? I just love it all. But enough pouring my heart out,
I guess I love it so much that its been seeping into my subconcious? I’m honestly not sure why, I don’t really recall being like this with other series that I was/am crazy about. If I had to theorize about it, maybe its because of the following?:
I really hope this isn’t indicative of any underlying issues… But regardless, the extent it shows up usually varies; sometimes a few characters appear, or sometimes the entire dream is focused around the series.
I already have close to 2 weeks of dream logs accumulated, but I’ll post them sparingly, and currate them based on the most interesting ones or the ones that reveal the least personal information. I’ll probably include multiple dreams in individual posts too, depending on size. Note that these dreams probably won’t be in chronological order at first, but if a chronology that matters does arise I’ll make note of that. Additionally, these dreams are recollected to the best of my ability; some details are fuzzy, and can range from ‘absolutely happened’ to ‘think that happened based on context clues’, if only due to how dreams work obviously.
Anyways, without further ado,
[CW: Mentions of kidnapping, entrapment, but not really intense. If you’re squeamish to that sort of thing I’d sit this one out.]
I was at a boardwalk, surrounded by a ton of other people. I was carrying a bag with 2 beers, 2 bottles of lemon-flavoured vodka, and some other ingredients that I assume were meant to be used in a cocktail recipe. I believe I was intending to get drunk with a friend from school. The air felt kind of brisk, I think?
I noticed a large crowd alongside the boardwalk; roaring sounds came and went. I took a closer look, and noticed… remote control cars? Except these were big enough for one single person to fit in. These vehicles were controlled with the driver’s smartphone. Some were being directly rode on, while others were being driven from a distance.
An old aquantaince let me drive his vehicle; I remember it feeling surprisingly responsive for touch screen controls (yes really).
Anyways, something happened after that. I don’t know how the RC cars were related, if at all (why put it in the blog post then? I don’t know, just in case I guess?), but as I was making my way away from the boardwalk I noticed freshly laid rail tracks, that seemingly came from nowhere. Minecarts (specifically ones modelled after the ones in Minecraft, I guess thats my only frame of reference) rode on these rails; these carts seemed to have… people from Gensokyo? I specifically remember seeing Hisami, that purple grape reaper-type from the newest entry, in one of the carts.
The details get incredibly fuzzy from here, but I’ll try my best to piece it together.
Something or someone kidnapped me; there goes my drinking plans. I don’t know who it was, but I remember them being a figure draped in yellow, and they had long, fake fingernails, and they were possibly not human; not in an intense and terrifying way oddly enough? Despite that, it still seemed like I was in danger. They wanted something and I didn’t have it. I’m forcefully escored to an abandonded house; it kinda looked like a rural american home? It was painted yellow I think, and was clearly falling apart. The windows at the top were smashed in. They drag me in, pull me upstairs, and force me into a dirty bathroom with them. I remember them talking in a very raspy and creepy voice, but what they said is lost to my subconcious.
Anyways, I’m trapped in here. For some reason, I try to do a KameHameHa (like from Dragon Ball). That fails, and I just look like an idiot. The yellow thing laughs at me.
Amidst the laughter, bang. The door is busted down in one broad kick. It is none other than… Patchouli Fucking Knowledge????. From the top of her lungs, she yells “KameHameHa”, and actually fucking pulls one off, unleashing a bright blue beam of energy that pummels the yellow thing directly in (what I think was) their face, knocking them out cold in one fell swoop.
Patchouli is of course, wearing her signature pajamas. Because she’s Patchouli Knowledge. She’d wear pajamas to a funeral. She reaches a hand out and does the “come with me if you want to live” thing from Terminator 2. We waste no time and scamper out of the house hurridely.
I unfortunately do not remember what happens after that. What I do remember is one scene however; I don’t know how or if this connected to anything else, but considering the mass migration, I’m guessing this happened after the barrier crossing.
Sakuya Izayoi, Sanae Kochiya, and what I think was Sumireko Usami were waiting outside one of those roadside-rural convenience stores. There was a vintage Coca-Cola machine next to them. They stand idly, possibly waiting for someone as morning becomes noon, noon becomes evening, evening becomes dusk, hours pass.
Unfortunately, thats where this dream ends.
Fan Theories for my own dreams??? Somebody call MatPat!
Considering the Touhou-centric nature of the latter half, I’m inclined to say that maybe the weird yellow thing was a Youkai of some sorts? I have no idea what Youkai they’d be though, any that would fit the description don’t really come to mind (though to be fair I don’t know much about this.) If anyone has any idea, feel free to reach out at my Mastodon account here: https://tech.lgbt/@radicalpersondude.
If we’re applying logic to dreams that are naturally devoid of it, why was Patchouli the one who jumped into action? Is she trying to take control of an experiment gone wrong? If so, is that why everyone was crossing the barrier? but why in Minecarts?.
I’m guessing the rural abandonded house and roadside convenience store are there simply out of the fact that I feel a weird nostalgia for rural-type americana.
Anyways, I guess this concludes the first entry in Esoteric Record of Touhou-centric Dreams. I’ll try to update this every week (if only so I don’t run out of content, hopefully), but no promises.
back to my blog